Wednesday, May 8, 2019

Needing Life

As I go through my WIP folder, I discover poems that were completed long ago. These poems, if deemed ok in my opinion, will be posted here. For the ones I deem not acceptable, they will never see the light of day. As always, I hope you enjoy my poetry. If you do, please subscribe to get the latest updates. If you don't, so be it. 

Rod Kok
May 8, 2019

It used to be easy
to believe, to trust,
to dance with sunbeams
as they radiated enthusiasm
through the window
to my soul.

But somewhere
on this forked road,
light stopped penetrating,
casting shadows which bled
into darkness.

I am overcome
by a mist, a cold embrace
drawing me down
to its passionless depths.

I am cold and shivering.
I feel naked and alone.
I am scared.

I need your heat,
your love, your caress.

I need life.

Monday, May 6, 2019


I wrote this a few years ago, and let it in my WIP folder. The message today is every bit as real as it was then. Nothing has changed.

Rod Kok
May 6, 2019

A battle is raging,
a war is being fought.
Two foes fight
over one weary soul.

An epic contest
between Right
and Wrong,
my head is in conflict
with my heart.

Desire wields
a sword,
honed on a whetstone
of Passion.

Wisdom parries
what surely could be
a mortal strike,
while Reason’s voice
is faintly heard.

A blow is struck,
not by arrow
or blade,
but by Words,
penetrating through
the vigilance of my Heart.
Circumspection leads
a counter-attack,
prevailing to gain an edge
for Right.

Conscience interferes,
creating diversions
wherever a foothold
can be found.

A battle is raging;
my head and my heart
each claim victory.

But Conquest has not arrived,
so this fight goes on.

Deep in my soul,
Lust is wrestling Purity.
Damnation pulls Salvation
to the precipice,
only to be denied
by Sacrifice.

I am weary;
I grow tired of
this confrontation.

I grow weary;
I pray for peace.
I pray
for escape.

Monday, January 28, 2019

Epic Sigh or, This is how I feel about me

Here is my latest poem that I am willing to share. I wrote this after a session with my psychologist. No, she doesn't make me feel this way but she sure does make me think. And that is a good thing. Mostly. Please enjoy the poem.

Rod E Kok
January 28, 2019

I lack truth.
Seriously, I do not have
a clue.
Am I supposed to have
all my sh*t together?
Because I don't.
I don't even have sh*t,
never mind having it

Insert an epic sigh
right here.
That is me,
I do not like
the returns on this path.

I have been told
(yesterday even!)
that I am too hard
on myself.
Yeah, character flaw
and all those other
evaluative (judgmental)

I get it.
But seriously.
Am I really supposed to have
all my sh*t together?
Because I don't.
And probably never will.

Monday, January 7, 2019

That Feeling

Happy new year, dear reader! May your 2019 be filled with happiness and poetry! Lately, my mind has been delving into darker themes (again). No, my depression is not driving my words but rather I am writing with eyes wide open. Maybe dark is the wrong word...let's use 'different'. I am trying to explore different ways to express. The poem I wrote today is borne from nothing personal (this time). But rather it is the offspring of thoughts that just sort of came together in a short period of time. This is the start of my exploration into 'different'. Please enjoy.

Rod E Kok
January 7, 2019

Do you know the feeling of angst,
sitting in the pit
of your stomach?
Maybe angst is the wrong word…
call it whatever you want.
But it is a feeling.
Like something is eating you
from inside out.
Yeah, that sensation.
I have it every time
my thoughts stray.